What an American Women Needs.

Leave the deer out of it and come make me brunch instead.

“American women don’t have anyone hunting for them—that’s their real problem.” That’s Rebecca Mead’s take. You have to read her full article to get the gist and not get your panties in a bundle if you find that statement even mildly offensive. But you know, even out of context, I agree on some abstract level. Mostly because it’s just nice to have someone do things for you. I place a premium on being able to take care of male-oriented things (like hunting) myself: I can change a tire in less than 10 minutes and I keep around a container of compound and a putty knife to fill in the holes I put in my walls because I can’t find a sturdy wall space to hang certain items. (To name a couple of examples of how fiercely independent I am.) But sometimes you just need a man to take care of shit.

1. A good mechanic (or two) who fixes cars with no bravado and no mark up, and throws in little things for free. Because it’s the little things that count. (Love Miguel and Kevin.)

2. An even better neighbor to lend emotional support and operate the shop vac when your apartment floods.

3. A gay man (or two) to tell you how fabulous and pretty you are. (Girlfriends count for this, too, though it is admittedly different.)

4. Any man (or woman – because hell I’m not picky when it comes to food) who can cook up a Sunday brunch.

I think there are a couple more who belong on this list, but it’s barely 8 a.m. and I’m only halfway through my homemade decaf eggnog latte. ($4 at Starbucks!)

My Homemade Eggnog recipe:


Steamed lite eggnog. (I just poured mine in a pot and set heat to med high. When it started steaming I took it off the burner.)

Pour eggnog in your mug first. Place in a whisk. Hold whisk between palms. (I learned this trick from my dear friend Nancy, who uses a manual egg beater with even better results.) Roll whisk briskly between hands until nog foams.

Pour in coffee.

Sprinkle with nutmeg.

Walk down to Starbucks and sit smugly in one of their cozy, crumb-filled chairs.


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