Is your hair gay?

One of these whorls is gay.

One of these whorls is gay.

I didn’t even know I had a whorl. But it’s kind of a big thing when it comes to sexual orientation. Apparently, a counter-clockwise whorl is more common in gay men. (So is being left handed.) My former hair stylist Coco, who wore leather from head to toe all day long, told me people who live below the equator have hair that grows counter clockwise. She did not use the word whorl, though she did point to the crown of my head. She said the opposing whorl growth happens for the same reason water flushes down Brazilian toilets in the opposite direction of those in Portland. It’s a hemisphere thing.

Does that mean that gay people in the lower hemisphere have hair that grows clockwise?

And what the hell is up with bisexual’s hair? I guess jacked up hair is just what they get for not picking a side and sticking to it.

Just kidding.

Really.

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