Pattern Sickness

I love this pattern. But if it were hurting me I would shred it to bits.

I love this pattern. But if it were hurting me I would take some scissors to it's pretty little flowers and shred it to bits.

Not all patterns are bad.

There are some good patterns out there that I engage in: I wake up and go to work Monday through Friday.

Then there are the benign patterns: The first thing I do when I get home from work (and after feeding the cat) is sit on the toilet and inspect my nails. Weird, but it’s just how I do.

And the patterns that are uncomfortable, but harmless nonetheless: Eating too many dried apricots at once. (Not that I would ever do that.)

If we’re talking textile patterns, it’s always flowers over stripes for me.

And then there are the emotional patterns. Relationship patterns. Love patterns.

There is a common pattern for men and woman alike to be attracted to people who are not interested in having a relationship with them. (And of course, we tend not to like the ones who are completely available. Interested people are never quite as interesting.) Perhaps you’ve felt doomed to this pattern of making bad choices, of choosing wrong. With each new date, you think it will be different. And then kerplop. That pattern comes cycling around again and lands squarely on your heart enabling yet another juicy and dramatic pattern of you as victim to the cruel alternative universe populated by emotionally unavailable ghouls. (Though I have to wonder, if one is attracted to another who is emotionally available, does that mean the former is emotionally unavailable, too?)

Victimization is so boring, though. It’s like blah blah blah, whine whine whine (then wine wine wine), more blah blah blah. And the reality is, patterns can be broken. You just stop the insanity before it begins. (And the signs are there early on. Always.) Or maybe a little easier, don’t get involved with people so quickly a la Hollywood so that if and when he/she does reveal that he’s/she’s moving back to Oregon, Ohio or Canada (Canada’s a big black hole of disastrous love for me), it just doesn’t sting so sharply. I mean, you have to put yourself out there a little. Closing yourself off does not a pattern break. Maybe just stick out a toe or a hand—phalanges and limbs you technically can do without. Leave your internal organs behind the safety line. And maybe throw on some chain mail. And make Wonder Woman bracelets out of aluminum foil. Just because you can.

My bad pattern: I don’t look out for #1 enough. To break this pattern I will start with a manicure. Essie color: Wicked

In other news, did I mention I need a new fall bag? My favorite one just broke. It’s sad. I’m looking for a vintage (or vintage looking) brown bag, preferrably with some exposed stitching. I don’t prefer lots of buckles or hardware or anything. Kthanks.

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